its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
The adults are the big ones right?
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
