you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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