"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
