so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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