just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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