I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
