Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
I told them you could toss a salad like wolfgang puck
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
