Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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