butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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