Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
