don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
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