I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
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