I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
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Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
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You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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