I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
