I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
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