Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
