i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Randomize
