So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I party with great urgency now.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
