operation have a gay friend backfired
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
