i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Randomize
