ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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