Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
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