Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Randomize
