Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
No stitches, just platelets and will power
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
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