I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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