Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
