Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Just remembered someone sprayed perfume in my mouth last night after convincing me it was vodka and that i tried to herd ducks around campus and bring one home.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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