My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
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