Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
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