i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Randomize
