o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
It was confusing and full of hummus
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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