i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
As I was puking last night I told them "it's ok I'm a paramedic"
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
We have so much sex to catch up on
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
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