I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
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