There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
He asked me if I remembered touching his police badge. awk.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
