Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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