"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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