Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
you didnt have any toilet paper so I just took a shower
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
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