Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
Randomize
