do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
my grandpa was trying to put butter into the pepsi and i'm like "grandpa what are you doing" and he looks down and goes "well i guess that wouldn't taste good anyway"
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
