so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SO HELP ME GOD THERE IS A SPIDER IN THIS PIZZA. IT IS VERY SMALL IT IS INSIDE THE CRUST AND IT IS ALIVE. I'M SO HUNGRY DO I KEEP EATING
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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