it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I woke up with my phone plugged into an extension cord in my garage. No clue how I got home. Videos of me flogging my roommate with my set of keys telling him he's the worst roommate ever. And my mom woke me up at 8am asking how to make a DVD...Goddamnit first Friday.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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