New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
did i just pee glitter
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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