I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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