we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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