i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
