Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
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