What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Chris threw beer can at guy. Guy ended up being a fighter. Chris got his eye socket broke. Fighter got hand re-broke. Chris is passed out. Fighter is in kellys bed. everybody won last night. I think.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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