i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Randomize
