I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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