38 yer olds are good kisserssss
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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