he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
