So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
Randomize
